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define('DISALLOW_FILE_MODS', true);{"id":222,"date":"2008-07-01T11:26:11","date_gmt":"2008-07-01T18:26:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/imaginarysunshine.com\/index.php\/content\/top10-fired\/"},"modified":"2008-07-01T11:26:11","modified_gmt":"2008-07-01T18:26:11","slug":"fired","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/imaginarysunshine.com\/index.php\/top10\/fired\/","title":{"rendered":"Top 10 Ways to Get Fired"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Any of the things listed below should get you fired, or at least penalized. However, you probably shouldn&#8217;t do anything of the things listed below unless you really don&#8217;t care about getting a good reference ever.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Be late for work by at least an hour, every single shift, until you&#8217;re fired.<\/li>\n<li>Blatently flirt with your coworkers &#8211; this may also get you slapped with a sexual harassment lawsuit.<\/li>\n<li>Use the company phone to make long distance calls to your grandparents.<\/li>\n<li>Throw a major tantrum in front of your boss or to your boss and don&#8217;t apologize afterwards.<\/li>\n<li>Make a big fuss about how you&#8217;re the only one that does any work &#8211; works best when this is definitely not the case.<\/li>\n<li>Complain about everything: your boss, your coworkers, your customers. Bonus points for complaining to your customers about the customers.<\/li>\n<li>Break the dress code in every single way possible.<\/li>\n<li>Complain when your customers give you all coins and make a big show of counting out each coin, screwing up the counting when they complain about how long you&#8217;re taking, and then starting all over.<\/li>\n<li>Paint your nails when you&#8217;re supposed to be working.<\/li>\n<li>While working at the cashier, read a book instead. When customers ask you to ring up their purchases, tell them to wait until you&#8217;re finished the chapter.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Any of the things listed below should get you fired, or at least penalized. However, you probably shouldn&#8217;t do anything of the things listed below unless you really don&#8217;t care about getting a good reference ever. Be late for work by at least an hour, every single shift, until you&#8217;re fired. Blatently flirt with your [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"parent":233,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/imaginarysunshine.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/222"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/imaginarysunshine.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/imaginarysunshine.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/imaginarysunshine.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/imaginarysunshine.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=222"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/imaginarysunshine.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/222\/revisions"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/imaginarysunshine.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/233"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/imaginarysunshine.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=222"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}