Top 10 Ways to Blow a Job Interview

I’m not really sure why you’d want to blow a job interview, unless you didn’t really want to work there in the first place, which begs the question: Why did you apply there in the first place? But anyways, any of the following suggestions will probably leave a horrible first impression and you probably won’t get the job, at least you shouldn’t…

• Show up very late for the interview.
• Wear pj bottoms to the interviews. Bonus points for fuzzy animal slippers instead of proper shoes.
• Chew gum and blow bubbles whenever you get a chance to.
• Do a double take and tell the interviewer that you thought they were a man/woman (whichever is opposite of what they actually are).
• In the middle of the interview, start whistling and twiddling your thumbs. When asked, inform the interviewer that you thought they were already done speaking.
• Turn the tables and ask the interviewer about their qualifications and why you should hire them.
• Claim to be the blood descendant of someone important and/or famous. ie. You’re related to Jack the Ripper (inform them of his true identity), Attila the Hun, Queen Victoria or some very well known porn star.
• Check out the degrees hanging on the wall and tell them that they didn’t know people still went to those schools.
• Ask them immediately for a raise. Once they tell you that you haven’t gotten the job yet, demand to speak to their supervisor.
• At the end of the interview, tell them that their outfit clashes horribly with the decor in the room.