M: I nearly got killed by a goat today.
C: Michelle…
M: Yes?
C: A goat?
M: No. I nearly got killed by a goat today. True story.
C: Okay, whatever you say.
M: … You don’t believe me.
C: I didn’t say that. Just… Why was there a goat at your school?
M: I don’t know. There just was.
C: Okay, sweetie, whatever you say.
M: [pause] I hate you sometimes.
C: Now you’ve just hurt my feelings.
M: Yeah, well, I nearly got killed by a goat.
C: Are you saying my feelings don’t matter?
M: I didn’t say that… It’s just… Well… Me getting physically impaled onto the horns on a goat’s head totally beats you getting your feelings hurt by someone who’s fourteen inches shorter than you and less than half your weight.
C: I see. I think.
M: Good, now get back to work, dear, your break’s over.

6 Responses

  1. What. The. Fuck.

    A GOAT at your school? I might expect that of some redneck school like.. you know, some around here, but good lord. Why would people around there have goats anyway? Crazy stuff.. o.O I’m glad the guy caught it.. goats can be dangerous crazy creatures.

  2. A goat??? odd…

    This totally remind me of this time… I was late waking up so I got my dad to drive me up to SFU… and near the top I was like “look dad, there a dog, but where’s the owner? There’s no one around” And then my dad said “uhhh… that’s not a dog. That’s a coyote.” -__-“

  3. I’ve just read your past four or five blogs… and I’ve been laughing a lot. I love how you’re always so ironic about things; just cracks me up!

    As for the goat part… it’s weird how someone walks a goat AT UNI, and it’s even weirder he let the animal come running at you… But I’m glad you survived. 🙂


  4. lol. this reminds me of some of the things I used to see at school ..my ex-bf would always be like “nichole i’ve told you not to drink and go to school ” and I used to tell him it was to early to be on the boat with the captain, and i’m not talking bout captain crunch

    your jealousy of my camera seems to be shared by many. hmm. lol

  5. Gosh why on earth was there a goat. A guy with a goat on a leash. Hilarious, actually. In my first year of high school, I was quite interested in the school farm. Then one of the goats thought it would be nice to eat my hair. Far out. I think I screamed pretty loud. Bleurgh.

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