I just had this conversation with a friend:
J: I think I need help.
M: And you’re just figuring this out now…? Bit on the slow side, J.
J: Not that kind of help!
M: Uh huh. So what do you need help with?
J: You know P? In our class?
J: I want to go out with her.
M: Then ask her out?
J: But I don’t know how.
M: Walk up to her and then go “P, I was wondering if you’d like to go out with me for insert date event here”.
J: I can’t just do that!
M: Umm, yeah, you can. You did that to C last term, remember?
J: And remember what happened after?
M: Oh yeah (laughter) she pointed out her engagement ring to you. Still don’t know how you missed it. (laughter)
J: You can stop laughing now…
M: Oh come on, it was hilarious. Anyways, just ask P out. Or would you like me to ask her if she’s engaged first before you do?
J: Engaged, married, into girls, already in a relationship that I can’t talk her out of…
M: You’re going to owe me.
J: Don’t I already?
M: Yeah… I’ll ask on Friday, show up to class late like you normally do or something.
J: I love you, you’re the best.
M: Wow, professing love, you really must be into her.
J: Have you checked her out?
M: Umm… I can safely say that I haven’t looked at her like that.
J: You’re missing out!
M: … Right. Anyways, I’m going to go now.
J: Okay, thanks again!
M: I want cupcakes on Friday. And that icing recipe that you refuse to give me!