Hey, drunken phone call conversation time!

J: Michelle?
M: Yes…?
J: Michelle. You have to help me.
M: (thinking: have to help?) What’s up?
J: N’s not giving me back my umm… i… i… i… iPod?
M: Erm… Have you talked to him since you dumped him?
J: OF COURSE I HAVE! (note to self: drunk J likes speaking loudly)
M: Okay, here’s what you need to do. Sober up, then report the theft to campus security.
J: Why can’t I do it right nooooooooow? (whine, whine, whine)
M: Because, J, you’re drunk. They’re more likely to take you seriously if you’re sober and can actually tell them what was taken.
J: Are you sure?
M: (thinking: Wow, you must be drunk.) Yes, I’m sure. Go tomorrow morning and report it. Give them his address and tell them what was stolen and give them the serial number as well.
J: Why do I need to give them cereal? Don’t they eat breakfast before work?
M: (thinking: Why can’t she call someone else? Anyone else? Why me?) Yes, that’s exactly right. They don’t eat breakfast before work.
J: Thanks, Michelle, you saved my life.
M: (thinking: Someone has low expectations…) Okay?

I hung up while she was asking me about what kinds of cereal she should bring them. Really? Seriously? In the event that her boyfriend is keeping her expensive electronic device that cost her over two hundred dollars, the first thing she should do is not start drunk-calling people. The first thing that she should have done was either demand to get it back or go straight to campus security with his name, the product description and his address so that they can do something about it. Three cheers for campus security. And if she doesn’t get it back soon, I’m going to ‘borrow’ her cell phone just to take my number off her contacts list. We’re not even that good of friends, why does she feel the need to tell me everything?

Anyways, back to my boring old life… Valentine’s Day is looking like it’s going to go nicely… If all goes according to plan, his parents are going away for the weekend and I’m spending the entire day day with him. (!!!) Excitement? Very much so. I still have no clue what we’re doing though, but he says that it’s going to be fun. Granted, not quite sure what that’s going to entail, but I guess I’ll find out soon enough! Plus it’d be a nice way to end the week, after two midterms, and before I start studying and reviewing like crazy for my chemistry midterm. Silly school, setting midterms near the middle of the term! Ahh well, luckily there’ll be other people suffering with me…? After all, misery loves company!

4 Responses

  1. muaha, maybe it’s just me but i find drunk phone calls from friends sooo funny. But, then again, I wasn’t the one getting the phone call 😉 Good luck on your midterms!

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